


(God was) Never on Your Side

by type_here



Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, contain ridiculously open ended and 3am rambly kind of writing, unbetaed, vague mention of sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2016-11-26
Packaged: 2018-09-02 06:48:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8654902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/type_here/pseuds/type_here
Summary: You can't ask him what it all means, he was never on your side.





	

Eiffel sneaks out of his bunk at night and heads toward the Urania, toward Jacobi’s quarters. He knows Hera sees him go, but he also believe in her discretion on the matter. He still looked up nervously at one of her camera, mouths a small “Sorry!” at her.

They don’t talk much about anything, Jacobi and him, not really. It’s more hungry kisses and the distraction of sex more than anything else between them. It’s hands roaming all over, bites and pent up aggression. It’s pinning each other against the bunk and screaming each other’s name.

Some rare time, when they are drunken out of their mind, it’s almost endearments, almost “love you”s on the tip of their tongues, more slurred than spoken before falling asleep.

It becomes almost routine and it almost feels good. It becomes more casual touches and less feeling too bruised inside and out to do anything. It’s something? Neither of them know what to think of it, but yeah, it’s something. They don’t really talk about what it is or what it could be.

Eiffel tries to let himself not care too much. Just like Kate though, just like everyone anywhere in between now and then, between Earth and almost eight light years away from it, he ends up caring a little too much. He ends up thinking too much about a name, moans it too loudly in the throes of pleasure, whisper it in the dead of the night and he knows full well that it’s fire.

Just like a moth, he knows full well he’s gonna get burned. 

Then, it all comes down to this. To the space between them and a gun Eiffel could see in Jacobi’s hands. In such close quarters he knew that he wouldn’t miss. He looks to the ground. “So this is how it ends?” he asked, his tone flat.

“ Yep. Did you ever thought I would be on your side? The first thing I told you was that if he asked me to do it, I would. And he asked me. You don’t intend to fight back either, don’t you?”

That’s the thing that burns, that’s the spark that burn away at the moth’s wings. It’s the last of their explosive encounters. It’s taking sides, lines drawn in the sand and crossed over with no more intentions than to hurt.

The last question sounds rhetorical to Eiffel but he still answers it anyways.

“Why should I? I got nothing back for me on Earth. We both got nothing back on Earth and clearly you don’t care. You can always go back to Kepler and all is good. Nobody ever care for losers like me anyways.You still have a choice though.” There is no accusation there, just words ringing true to him.

Eiffel sighs. 

He knows full well he been lied to all this time. Nobody was taking care of anyone back home and everybody thought they were dead anyways. So what was the point really? What was the goddamn point? He takes Jacobi’s hand and the gun along with it and pointed it at his chest. He could see Jacobi actually hesitate and he almost chuckled at this.

“Should I help you pull that trigger?”

“Eiffel, for what it’s worth, I did- I do care. “ Jacobi lowers the gun and closes the gap. It’s a fist in the fabric of Eiffel’s shirt and a bruising kiss for old times sake.

They both hear the rest of the crew, the rest of that fight coming their way. From the corner of his half-lidded eyes, Jacobi can see Kepler turn around the corner.

They do not care what could happen next. It all comes down to this. To the space between them and a gun Eiffel could see in Jacobi’s hands, it’s taking sides, lines drawn in the sand until they are erased by the tide.

It all comes down to this.


End file.
